Saturday
Mar062010
Choppin Logic: ZOWZERS!! It’s sweeping the Nation!!
Saturday, March 6, 2010 at 11:26PM
In case you’ve been living under a rock for the past week or so let me inform you that the latest buzz word sweeping the social media outlets is ZOWZER! I, John E. Bravo, the originator of the viral infection of the word ZOWZERS am challenging you to simply step outside and in a loud voice say, “ZOWZERS!”, if you can do so without feeling the rush and power of the word as it tickles your vocal chords well you are not human.
ZOWZERS has quickly become the most versatile word in the English language (not including its bastard French and Spanish versions, LE GRAND ZOWZERS and LES GRANDE ZOWZERS respectively). Its original form was one of disbelief mixed with excitement at something that crept up on you like a shot of whiskey at your first sleepover. For instance, when a car load of hotties pulls up next to you at the stop light and flashes you a smile (wink, wink) the appropriate response would be, “ZOWZERS! I’m good looking!”
Of course as words are incorporated into the vernacular of the American public there tends to be a distortion from the original usage. ZOWZERS has now come to encompass every emotion known to mankind. Someone stubs their toe and you hear, “Z@WZ#&S! That stung like a boot full of bees” or some negative Nellie doesn’t get their way and in their head they hear, “Zowzers. Wah, wah”. Even bedrooms across America have been filled with the echoes of, “UMMMMMM, ZOWZERS!” and if they are lucky, “ZOWWWWWWZERRRRRRS!”
The best part is that the overall morale of the country has been lifted while simultaneously reversing the moral decline (ZOWZERS is quickly replacing all curse words) because of the positive and uplifting influence of the word ZOWZERS!
P.S. ZOWZERS! That’s one good post!
ZOWZERS has quickly become the most versatile word in the English language (not including its bastard French and Spanish versions, LE GRAND ZOWZERS and LES GRANDE ZOWZERS respectively). Its original form was one of disbelief mixed with excitement at something that crept up on you like a shot of whiskey at your first sleepover. For instance, when a car load of hotties pulls up next to you at the stop light and flashes you a smile (wink, wink) the appropriate response would be, “ZOWZERS! I’m good looking!”
Of course as words are incorporated into the vernacular of the American public there tends to be a distortion from the original usage. ZOWZERS has now come to encompass every emotion known to mankind. Someone stubs their toe and you hear, “Z@WZ#&S! That stung like a boot full of bees” or some negative Nellie doesn’t get their way and in their head they hear, “Zowzers. Wah, wah”. Even bedrooms across America have been filled with the echoes of, “UMMMMMM, ZOWZERS!” and if they are lucky, “ZOWWWWWWZERRRRRRS!”
The best part is that the overall morale of the country has been lifted while simultaneously reversing the moral decline (ZOWZERS is quickly replacing all curse words) because of the positive and uplifting influence of the word ZOWZERS!
P.S. ZOWZERS! That’s one good post!
Reader Comments