Thursday
Feb072008
Random Acts of Choppiness.....
Thursday, February 7, 2008 at 04:41PM
I just happened to be sitting on the public commode today and was wondering why is there such a lack of communication between not only nations and cultures but also individuals. Then it hit me like a cold splash of toilet water from a fat turd. It is our inability as humans to have bathroom banter. Why is it that as soon as we enter the crapper our mouths pucker up tighter than a homophobic's asshole around a gay dude?
I feel it is this inability to talk while on the porcelin that is the downfall of our so called civilized world. If we don't even have the common decency to ask, "Hey how is everything going over on that side of the stall?", then how will our leaders be able to ask other heads of state, "Hey how is everything going over on that side of the world?" The Russian's Iron Curtain and the East German's Berlin Wall are symbolic in that they are like giant stalls that were separating humanity.
Now I am not talking about putting your hand under the stall aka Senator Craig of Idaho and looking for favors if you know what I mean; of course unless you are out of toilet paper or you just took your first solid shit in three days after having the flu and are looking for a low five before you start to wipe then you are okay.
The bathroom is a great place to talk about anything. You can be like, "Man something about that Shaquille O'Neal trade smells about as funny as this draft beer poop I just took" or "Man that David Blaine is about as slippery as a White Castle slider poop, he can get out of anything and fast" or "Damn that George Bush Jr. is about as full of it as this toilet is with this soft serve yogurt shit I just squeezed out". See you can talk about anything. Race doesn't matter beyond the brown wall, unless it is a friendly bet to see who gets done first.
So let's increase the bathroom banter for the sake of humanity, and for starters you can drop this joke:
Who was the public toilets favorite rapper? of course it was Stall Wall. It would have been 2-ply until he flushed his career away.
I feel it is this inability to talk while on the porcelin that is the downfall of our so called civilized world. If we don't even have the common decency to ask, "Hey how is everything going over on that side of the stall?", then how will our leaders be able to ask other heads of state, "Hey how is everything going over on that side of the world?" The Russian's Iron Curtain and the East German's Berlin Wall are symbolic in that they are like giant stalls that were separating humanity.
Now I am not talking about putting your hand under the stall aka Senator Craig of Idaho and looking for favors if you know what I mean; of course unless you are out of toilet paper or you just took your first solid shit in three days after having the flu and are looking for a low five before you start to wipe then you are okay.
The bathroom is a great place to talk about anything. You can be like, "Man something about that Shaquille O'Neal trade smells about as funny as this draft beer poop I just took" or "Man that David Blaine is about as slippery as a White Castle slider poop, he can get out of anything and fast" or "Damn that George Bush Jr. is about as full of it as this toilet is with this soft serve yogurt shit I just squeezed out". See you can talk about anything. Race doesn't matter beyond the brown wall, unless it is a friendly bet to see who gets done first.
So let's increase the bathroom banter for the sake of humanity, and for starters you can drop this joke:
Who was the public toilets favorite rapper? of course it was Stall Wall. It would have been 2-ply until he flushed his career away.
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