Get 2 Choppin

The first onion of the week award goes to some girl named ashley* The onion of the week goes to the person who is in the greatest opposition to the choppin' lifestyle. When choppin', the onion is the one thing that can bring down someone that is choppin' that is why it is of utmost importance to quickly remove that onion from the premise as soon as possible before the whole environment is affected by their stench of non-choppin'. This onion or non-chopper as I like to refer to them may actually believe there is no such thing as choppin' and for all intense purposes probably never will grasp the concept. As choppers we could pity this person or maybe even feel sorry for this person but mostly we should make fun of them and continually reiterate how non-choppin' they are and will always be.

*for legal purposes we cannot divulge her last name and true identity but she knows who she is.